At Outback on Thursday
Waitress: what side would you like? Fries? Sweet potato mash? Broccoli? Rice?
Joshie: hmm? *Pause….. I dunno…i should choose the healthy option but I want the unhealthy….hmmm
Me: You like broccoli…why not have broccoli and fries?
Waitress: Erm…you can only have one
Joshie: Wait! What?? One fry? That’s not enough…maybe I’ll have the broccoli
Waitress: no…one side…lots of fries-I’ll make sure there’s lots
Joshie: phew! One fry may be healthy but I’m hungry
Still at the resaurant but out of nowhere
Josh: hmmm…I’d never bring my girlfriend here. I’d take her to Saltgrass.
Dad: Why? Do you have a girlfriend?
Joshie: no. But the tv’s are too distracting. I want to make sure I pay her my full attention. Saltgrass doesn’t have tv’s 😍
*the last time we went to Saltgrass, it was election night and Joshie was cheering and fistpumping cos he saw on their tv’s Hilary had won a state and thought it was the whole election…awkward in ruby red Texas 😄
Me and my boss talking after school…
Boss: well, it should…
Josh: uggghhhh! I knew it!
Me: Knew what Josh? What’s up?
Josh: you’re gonna have one of them long boring adult conversations again and I’m not gonna be able to talk
Me: erm, yes probably! But don’t be rude…what were you saying boss?
Boss: well I was just gonna say that we need…
Joshie: yup! I was right Told ya! Boring!
No promotion for me this year then 😄
Joshie’s doing his Duty to God award at scouts this week and has chosen to pray everyday to earn it…
Me: so how’s this praying working out for you?
Joshie: erm…I dunno…I asked for good luck and I suppose I didn’t die when I choked on that steak in the restaurant…that was good luck right?
Methinks good luck would have meant he didn’t choke in the first place but hey ho…mysterious ways and all that 😇😈
One thought on “Joshie’s gems of the week”
Don’t know how you manage to keep a straight face, lol! (Does he realize he is so funny?) 😆